Continued

Tony: One thousand thirty-one, if you include that Jimmy Carter thing in his living room in '76 

Dylan: Can't we at least move it to the acoustic set 

Tony: Look man, you told me to take charge of this whole thing so you wouldn't have to be bothered, right?  If you want to waste everyone's time being indecisive, let me know and I'll be on my way to another gig 

<stands up angrily>.

Dylan: All right, man, sit down -- I'm sorry, I'm a little -- it's this goddamn pastrami -- my dog wouldn't eat this shit 

<He takes another big bite>.

Tony: All right, we're opening up with 

Dylan: Copper Kettle 

Tony: Bob –

Dylan: I want to open with Copper Kettle.  What's wrong with it?

Tony: Nothing 

Dylan: Then put it down 

Tony: The band doesn't know it 

Dylan: Well, they have another half hour to learn it.  It's three fucking chords, man 

Tony: We're not playing it.  We're either opening with Flood or Drifters 

Dylan: Why the fuck do I pay you extra for!  And you're all off buying leather outfits and picking up beer babes when you guys should be learning the rest of my fucking songs in your spare time 

Tony: Come on, we're running out of time here 

Dylan: All right, put it in the acoustic part 

Tony: Maybe next week, okay?

Dylan: No, man.  Tonight.  I want to play Copper fucking Kettle, tonight 

Tony: All right, then you play it solo -- on stage, by yourself -- like the old days before your hands started shaking so much 

Dylan: Fuck it.  What's the last encore?

Tony: Rainy Day 

Dylan: Look man, they're going to think I'm senile or something 

Tony: The kids love it.  It makes them think you take drugs 

Dylan: It's too noisy.  I feel like a scarecrow up there: "Evrybdy must get cloned, evrybdy must get boned, evryby must get 

Tony: Do you want to spend the next ten years playing Peter, Paul, and Mary reunions on PBS, or what?

Dylan: All right, all right.  What's the acoustic part?

Tony: I put in Tangled in A, Masters of War, and Baby Blue 

Dylan: Don't you think there are way too many people out there who've heard these songs til it makes them fucking puke already?

Tony: They always seem to cheer 

Dylan: They're cheering because they think I'm gonna bring out Pearl Jam for a duet -- wait, are those guys still together?

Tony: All right <numbers the list>, we still got Silvio in at 6 -- no alternates 

Dylan: Don't tell me -- for Jerry's kids 

Tony: You always love Silvio 

Dylan: -- use' ta 

Tony: It's really matured into something hard-edged and stylish and you love how it makes you look inscrutable during the mini-jam 

Dylan: I want you guys to work up Masterpiece, Little Maggie, and, and -- what's that one from the Christian years -- uh,

Tony: -- not Covenant Woman 

Dylan: I don't want you to mention those words in front of me ever again 

Tony: Bob 

Dylan: -- ever!

Tony: -- Man Gave Names to All the Animals?

Dylan: Yeah, that's the one!  How long will it take to get that ready as a full-assed reggae thing -- with the slave choir 

Tony <ignoring him>: I put big Maggie back at 13, for commercial balance and name-recognition 

Dylan <spits out meat>: I ain't gonna eat this shit no more, no more -- 

<taps the long sandwich on Tony's forehead> no more 

Tony: -- very funny.  For number 2, do you want Senor, or Tonight I'll Be Staying 

Dylan: Wait a minute, haven't we been doing I'll Be your Baby, Tonight -- in G, at 4 

Tony <scans list>: Yeah, so what?

Dylan: Well, that's 2 songs with 'Tonight' in the title, man!

Tony: -- so what?  It makes sense 

Dylan: They're gonna think I don't give a shit about anything anymore 

Tony: If you don't start paying attention again, I'm gonna let everyone know who actually wrote the lyrics to your last three -- um -- 'original' albums 

Dylan: -- and it shows.

Tony: Come on, man.  I never even graduated high school.  I'm trying 

Dylan: -- and if your handwriting doesn't improve, I'll make you play a whole show from a folding chair.

Tony: Fuck you, man.  I can get any gig in the world 

Dylan: -- riding on my goddamn coattails for a thousand shows, who couldn't?

Tony: Do you want to finish this, or do you want to just wing it like the Dead do 

Dylan: Get out of my fucking sight, man -- period.

Tony: I put Man of Peace in at 12 

Dylan: -- permanently!

Tony: -- with John Birch Blues as the alternate 

Dylan <slaps forehead and grabs the paper>: Why don't just let me figure the fucking thing out Tony <grabs it back>: Shut up and listen for a change.  For the second acoustic encore you can either have One Too Many Mornings or North Country 

Dylan <slumps back, depressed, finishing the beer>: Fine, just give me some peace and quiet <Knock on the door.  It's Bucky.> 

Bucky: You guys still in there?

Dylan: What the fuck does he want, man?

Bucky: Bob, I 

Dylan: Hey man, we're decomposing in here, can't you see 

Bucky: I found out why the strings keep breaking on the lap steel 

Dylan: Fuck the lap steel.  I told you, just use the mandolin 

Bucky: You told me you wanted 

Dylan: I told you to get rid of that ugly red coat and that ridiculous Colonel Sanders goatee Bucky: Fuck you, Bob 

Dylan: Thanks, man.  You're beautiful.  Don't ever change your octave.

The door SLAMS.

Dylan: Are we done?

Tony: Oh, yeah -- there was one more thing -- a lot of people are complaining about Real You at Last 

Dylan: Good.  Let 'em suffer 

Tony: -- and they want more harmonica.

Dylan: Who wants more harmonica?  Who?

Tony: Those babes that… 

Dylan: Well, fuck 'em!  No harmonica.  Ever again -- throw 'em all into the crowd.

Tony: Okay 

Dylan: Write that down.

Tony: Write what down?

Dylan: Whatever I tell you, from now on.

Tony <stands>: Have a good show, Bob.  The pleasure's been yours.

Dylan: Thanks for everything, uh -- <laughs to himself> -- bro –

Tony: Forget it 

Dylan <puts hand on Tony's shoulder>: Hey man, you know I appreciate you.  I'm sorry if I get a little -- uh, impatient or something 

Tony: You gotta learn to trust your audience and the people who serve you, man.  We're building up a big head of steam.  We're doing the college thing like we're 20 years old again!  We got the <studies crumpled notebook pages> balding hippie crowd, single mothers in their 40's, recovering addicts turned Republican, moshers -- the only group not on board full-tilt yet are blacks and the handicapped.

Dylan: I noticed that.  I been doing this fucking gig for 35 years, and since the protest thing dried up I've only noticed about 55 black people at my shows, and 46 of them were at that jail in New Jersey with Hurricane Carter 

Tony: Bob 

Dylan: Are they mad at me or something?

Tony: Look, you're respected by just about every ethnic and social group.  Christians loved you since 81, no matter what you sing now.  Isn't that enough? <checks his watch>

<Banging on door>: Fellas -- now!

Dylan: Let's get out of this hellhole <They walk down the hall>.

Tony: Oh yeah, let me know when you're ready to approve my lyrics for your next album.

Dylan: Fuck my next album.  Let's just stay in tune for once, okay?

Onstage a voice bellows into the darkness, "Ladies and Gentlemen, would you please welcome, Columbia recording artist, Bob Dylan..."

Tony: One more thing: would you mind not spitting in my ear when you sing T-Man next time Dylan <glaring>: What was that?

Tony: -- or use some dental floss, man -

The crowd erupts.

Dylan: Why do I need this?

They reach the darkened stage, everyone plugged in and waiting.

Dylan: Why?

The lights go up in a blaze.

Dylan: 🎤🎵 Crash on The Levee!  Water Gonna Overflow!  Swamp Gonna Rise, No Wind Gonna Blow....

⚠️ Why Showering During a Storm Is Risky

🚿⚡ A shower won’t “explode” in the Hollywood sense—but it can become dangerously electrified during a lightning strike

Lightning can travel through plumbing: If lightning strikes your house or nearby, it can follow metal pipes—and even plastic ones, since water conducts electricity well.

in protected areas and avoid touching metal surfaces.The current seeks a path to ground: That path might be through your showerhead, faucet, or even the water itself.

 Just because the plumbing is in the ground doesn’t always mean it’s grounded—especially when it comes to an electrical current as powerful as lightning. 

You become part of the circuit: If you're touching water or metal, the electricity can jump to you. That’s how people have been injured or even killed while bathing during storms.

Just because pipes and plumbing are below ground doesn’t mean they are safe from lightning strikes.

Given how lightning-prone our area is, it’s smart to:

Avoid all plumbing during storms—no showers, baths, dishwashing, or handwashing.

Wait 30 minutes after the last thunderclap before resuming water use.

Unplug electronics and avoid corded phones too—lightning can travel through wiring just as easily.

📍 Real-Time Lightning Tracking Tools

To stay ahead of the strikes, here are the best platforms:

LightningMaps.org Live global lightning strikes, animated maps, sound alerts Real-Time Lightning Map   

Blitzortung.org Color-coded strike age, detector network, storm tracking Live Lightning Map  

iWeatherNet Google Maps overlay, street-level strike data Latest Lightning Strikes  

These tools are especially useful during Florida’s peak storm hours (2–6 PM), when sea breezes collide and convection spikes.

🌪️ How Lightning Interacts with Hurricanes

Surprisingly, most hurricanes produce very little lightning. That’s because:

Hurricanes have horizontal winds, which don’t generate the strong vertical updrafts needed for lightning.

The eyewall and rainbands are usually too stable for the kind of turbulent mixing that sparks electrical charges.

But when lightning does show up in a hurricane, it’s a red flag:

⚠️ Eyewall lightning often signals rapid intensification, as seen in Hurricane Ian and Dorian.

Lightning tends to occur in outer spiral bands, where convection is more chaotic.

NOAA researchers now use lightning data to monitor hurricane strength and predict landfall impacts.